Posts Tagged breastfeeding

The Ticking and Tocking of My Biological Clock

When is it the right time to change your focus from new mom to second-time mom-to-be? What to Expect’s Lifestyle Editor, Emma Bing shares the ups and downs and the I-don’t-know-wheres of deciding whether or not to have another baby.

I’ve been an official mom for just more than a year now.

And as you may know, I am obsessed with my Lennox. Like crazy town, over board, no-lifeguard-on-duty obsessed. I want to shout my love from the roof tops. The kid even has his own Instagram feed.

So what could be more fun than another one, right? Or maybe not? That’s where I am right now, deciding whether to get pregnant and look forward to years of fun with another little one, or stand pat and enjoy all my waking (and many sleeping hours) with my one and only.

My biological clock has sounded a little something like this over the past two years:

Tick: I’m pregnant! I can’t wait to do this again and again!

Tock: I’m pregnant—I’m nauseous—never again!

Tick: My baby is kicking! I’m doing this again!

Tock: I’m in labor! Never again!

Tick: I’m holding my baby; I can’t wait to give him a sibling!

Tock: I haven’t slept in 3 months, never again!

Tick: My baby smiled at me for the first time! I can’t wait to do this again!

Tock: My baby puked in his bed in the middle of the night! Never again!

Tick: My baby took his first steps, I miss having an infant, let’s get pregnant!

You get the picture. Maybe you even know what I am talking about. I think most moms of one find themselves here. (And even if you aren’t a mom yet, you may go back and forth on whether you want to give one a go. But the trade-offs are a little different.)

Every day I change my mind on this. Am I ready?

Yes!

No!

Who knows!?

Even on those “tock” days when I swear Lennox will be my one-and-only, I don’t actually mean it. It’s like when I said I wanted to get rid of my bangs and then pictured my life bang-less (not a good look). In fact I always have a pregnancy test and ovulation test box in my bathroom cabinet… Just in case.

Now that my baby is a toddler and I hear the pitter-patter of little feet running through the house, I am missing the baby days. You know, when I could carry Lennox without him wanting me to put him down after .2 seconds. The thing is this, like puppies, babies grow up… as much as you want them to stay cuddly and sweet forever, teenage years happen.

While we are on the subject of “biological clock”, there is also the “age” factor. My mom was pregnant at 23, and in my “life vision” I would have expected (no pun intended) to have about three kids by now. With that being said it is also the age of the Halle Berrys of the world having babes in their 40s. (Granted, she does look 21 and I’m sure her uterus does too).

Also, I am not going to lie, I am strongly concerned about being pregnant with a toddler at my feet. In what land is that going to be easy? My first pregnancy I could be a lady of leisure, nap when I wanted, lay in bed all day like the queen of the house “requesting” what I needed (OK, that never happened).

With a hyper toddler running all over the place, and me expecting, things are going to get real. And by real I mean Mommy is going to have a breakdown at some point. And by some point I mean every day.

With that being said, I still do want to do this… Having Lennox was the best thing I have ever done. Let me say it again: The best thing I have ever done.

Now that I am a mom, I can’t remember what it was like B.B. (Before Boo), and honestly I don’t really want to. Being a mommy is like joining a special club. Initiation was getting fat, nausea, and hemorrhoids (I can’t be the only one here!) but the payoff is love, cuddles, those sticky little hands pulling at your leg to pick them up, and that smile that can stop time — or at least you wish it could.

Okay, question: Is it irrational to think that I won’t be able to love my next child as much as I love my lil’ boo? Probably. Even saying that out loud sounds crazy.

The fact is that I love Lennox so much I can’t even describe my love. I genuinely worry that I may eat him. It’s teetering on stalker status. I watch him sleep and save his early attempts at, uh, art. It’s infinite. He has my heart. But with that said, I would like to think that my heart is big enough for two… or three…

Next stop…baby-making? Or just getting the usual supplies at the baby store? I’ll be weighing these thoughts and more for a little while (I think). Stay tuned!

From the What to Expect editorial team and Heidi Murkoff

Should I Get My Child A Pet ?

Your Child and Pet


Whether it’s playing with a pooch or petting a purring kitty, there’s no doubt that pets can bring their owners (young and old) plenty of joy. But the advantages of pet ownership go well beyond the fact that they’re cuddly and lots of fun. So if you’ve been wondering whether this is the right time to add a four-legged (or two-winged or multi-finned) critter to your family, here are a few reasons why getting a pet may be a very good idea:

THE BENEFITS OF PETS: THEY TEACH KIDS VALUES
With a pet in the house, even the youngest toddler can pick up a few pointers about responsibility. Of course you’ll take on most of the pet-care chores, but your tot will absorb a lot from your nurturing example, like the importance of being kind and gentle. He can even lend a tiny hand with the easier jobs, like pouring food into a dish. By pitching in, he’ll realize that pets, just like people, need food, shelter, exercise, and love, teaching him valuable lessons about empathy and compassion.

THE BENEFITS OF PETS: THEY BOOST SELF-ESTEEM
There’s research showing that kids with family pets have higher self-esteem. Why? Probably because they have a four-legged (or two-legged) creature to love who loves them right back, and a friend to talk to and play with when no one else is around. Later on, when your child starts school, your pet can even boost his academic skills. Studies show that reading aloud to a loyal (and nonjudgmental) companion, like a dog, can turn a reluctant reader into a self-confident one. What’s not to love about that?

THE BENEFITS OF PETS: THEY’RE GOOD FOR EVERYONE’S HEALTH
Experts say that children who grow up with pets are less likely to develop common allergies thanks to early exposure to certain bacteria. (Of course, some children are genuinely allergic to animals — so check on that before you take the plunge.) And some research shows that pet owners tend to get sick less often — in fact, a 2012 study determined that children who lived with dogs were generally healthier during their first year of life, with fewer respiratory problems and less frequent ear infections than kids without canines. Another pro to pets? Brushing, patting, or stroking a furry creature can lower stress levels — and that’s just as true for moms and dads as it is for kids.

Moms Have the Hardest Job Ever! Here’s Proof

By Maura Hohman on November 05, 2015


If you’re a working parent, then you’re likely well-aware that balancing your career and the needs of your children is one tough job. Of course, your kids come first, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy to leave the office in the middle of the day to pick up your sick son or to skip the piano recital because of an important meeting.

But the good news is more parents, especially moms, have jobs outside the home than ever before, so you have more emotional support than working women of previous generations. In fact, a new study from Pew Research Center found that both parents work outside the home in 46 percent of two-parent households in 2015, compared to just 31 percent in 1970.

The downside? Working parents may be the new norm, but workplace and federal policies have yet to catch up to their needs, leaving them just as stressed and overworked as ever. Through phone interviews with 1,807 parents with kids under 18 from all 50 states, the Pew study found some harrowing stats about achieving work family balance today.

Mothers in most households do the lion’s share of childcare regardless of whether they work full-time, part-time or stay at home.
More than half – 56 percent – of all working parents say it’s difficult to balance their professional and family responsiblities.
One in five moms who work full-time say balancing work and family is very difficult, compared to 12 percent of dads.
Forty-one percent of working moms say having kids makes it harder to advance their career, as opposed to just 20 percent of dads.
Striking a good work-life balance affects how parents feel about parenting overall; of the parents who struggle with work life balance, only 36 percent say parenting is enjoyable all the time, compared to 50 percent of parents who have a good work-life balance.
Thirty-two percent of parents who struggle with work-life balance say parenting is stressful all the time, compared to 15 percent of parents who have a good work-life balance.
Four in 10 full-time working moms say they always feel rushed and feel they spend too little time with their kids.
These numbers prove how much work there is to be done for all working parents to feel supported, but the study found some positive trends, too. For example, dads spend fewer hours at work and take a more active role in childcare and around the house than dads of previous generations. And in over half of working households, both mom and dad are equally focused on their careers.

Until policies reflect how many working parents there are, it helps to know some tips and tricks to balancing a job and family. You should never be afraid to ask for help, whether it’s from friends, neighbors or even your boss. Try to establish boundaries and set aside time each day that’s just family time. And be flexible and forgive yourself when things don’t work out.

For tips, visit our Facebook page and post your questions.

 

 

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